If you are the one who has been cheated upon, you may think divorce is your only option, but divorce is a very big step. Take the time to answer a few questions before the papers are filed. Even though it may seem hopeless right now, your marriage may be worth saving.
1) Is your spouse truly sorry, or is he or she just telling you what they think you want to hear?
2) How likely is it that your spouse will cheat again? Do you foresee yourself being able to trust him or her again? This may not happen overnight, but is your spouse willing to take the necessary steps to regain your trust?
3) Can you handle the reality of living with your spouse after such a breach of trust has occurred?
4) Do you have the emotional maturity to get beyond this and move the relationship forward in a positive direction, or are you afraid the affair will always be on your mind even after counseling?
5) Do you feel the need to get revenge on your spouse by hurting him or her back or, worse yet, having an affair of your own?
6) Has anything changed that may prevent an affair from happening again? For example, is your spouse still working in the same environment where it all started or has he or she started a new job? Is he or she still spending a lot of time online, where the temptation to meet someone online may still exist?
I always encourage my Colorado Spring separation and divorce clients to ask themselves these important questions and try to save their marriage if at all possible. Separation may still be necessary, but divorce is a big step that must be entered into very seriously. In order to really get to the bottom of why your spouse was unfaithful and whether the marriage can be saved, marital counseling is usually recommended.
If you and your spouse choose to separate until a final decision is made, then it is important to have a separation agreement in place. This will allow the courts to make a temporary order of spousal support, child support and custody while you are living apart. A family lawyer at Marrison Law in Colorado Springs can help you file the necessary paperwork to help you get through a period of separation.