Effects of Divorce on Children
There is no book or secret recipe that can predict how your children will respond to you and your partner separating. Every child is different and deals with their emotions in their own way. School-age children understand that divorce means their mom and dad are not going to live together anymore. Most of them have friends whose parents are divorced and may have heard phrases such as "I'm going to my dad's house this weekend." However, the first thing that comes to most children's mind when they hear the word divorce is "What about me?"
When considering the effects of divorce on children, remember that kids will be anxious about things like moving or changing schools. Younger kids will worry about the logistics of their toys. How will they still get to play with them all? What about the pets? They'll have many detailed questions for you, such as if you still love their mom or dad, and first and foremost, if you still love them. You need to be prepared with comforting answers, and most importantly, you need to reassure them that are loved and will be cared for, no matter what.
Many children show signs of regression and insecurity, both at home and at school. Some effects of divorce on children include mood shifts, causing children to become angry, depressed, mischievous, clingy, or uncooperative. During this difficult time, your children will require additional attention and affection. The most amicable divorces can still create an earth-shattering change for any child, and kids find change to be very scary, especially one dealing with something as fundamental as their parents. They rely on routines, normalcy. Some will be openly sad or mad at you, while others may act like they don't care.
However, don’t get discouraged. School-age kids can be surprisingly resilient and malleable. How you explain the divorce to them will make a significant difference in how they can cope with it. Make sure you speak to them before, during, and after it happens. Remember that these are typical effects of divorce on children and what they need most from you right now is patience, reassurance, and consistency in the everyday routines they know. While this time will be difficult for you, remember that your children will be hurting as well. Be their rock, and in return, they may end up being the same to you.
Your children will be deeply affected by this change. Make sure you stay in tune with their needs and give them the love they will need. And if you need assistance in setting up your Child Visitation, contact the professionals at Marrison Family Law.